Our secret is out!

Friends, and by friends I mean a group of Nazarene white people (Yes Joe Ibanez, you count too), we have been found out. My wife, in all of her melanin-lacking glory found a blog called Stuff White People Like. Thinking it was just a joke, I checked it out, only to find every detail of my albinic life displayed in convenient blog format. You must check it out and be confronted with your own self-made stereotypes.
To save you some time, I want to highlight two of the posts:
For the Oregonians out there:
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/03/11/87-outdoor-performance-clothes/
And for the OKC1st folk out there:
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/03/05/82-hating-corporations/

It just blew your freaking mind, didn't it?

A day of letdowns and giving in to peer pressure

Yesterday Laura and I went on a gift-returning spree. My extended family gives some pretty ridiculous gifts, and so most holidays are Laura and I faking a smile and then looking for the gift receipts. First on our list was Mardel's. I know, I threw up in my mouth just thinking about that store too. Anyway, we return a ton of crap and get the new Shane Claiborne book and Jon Foreman's CD's, which brings me to letdown #1: Foreman's Fall EP sucks. The lyrics are amazing, but the guy just drones on and on. It's like he dosed up on tranquilizers before he started recording. Right, well, next on our list was Bath and Body Works. Why? Because this year my aunt got us two fancy bags that are exactly like the bags she got us last Christmas. Anyway, these had price tags for $65 bucks each, and Laura and I thought we'd have candles to last a lifetime with this exchange, which brings me to letdown #2: we could only return the bags for 90% off. That's right, these two designer bags got us 13 bucks. Apparently these bags are from two Christmases ago. Awesome.

So, on to me giving in to peer pressure. It seems the thing to do today is to rant about Wal-Mart and how it is actually run by the Anti-Christ himself. While I think Wal-Mart can't hold this position as long as anything Apple is being sold, I still hate the place. It's not because of a company staying within its rights and recouping losses in a lawsuit, it's because of my dear Broken Arrow. Down the street from my parents' house, there was a Wal-Mart. It was convenient and beautiful. However, they decide to build a Super Center two miles down the road, and so they close down my beloved store. That happened when I was in eighth grade. Last weekend Laura and I drove past the still vacant store. It's been a decade since they closed that store, and they still won't rent it out because they don't like Target. Also, if you ever drive through Guymon, you'll see where they built a Super Center right across the street from the old Wal-Mart. Seriously, right across the street. It's like watching Starbucks come to town.

Why I hate lawyers

Besides Zach Herbert's existence, malpractice suits, and three year degree programs, I hate lawyers because of ethics. We have to take this ethics class at school, and today's topic was end of life care. Of course, Oregon and its Christ-like allowance for doctor-assisted suicide came up. Now instead of allowing us to have a meaningful discussion, this lawyer/preceptor decides to talk about her stupid dog. She talks for fifteen minutes about how she loves her dog as much as her grandchildren, but the dog has a huge tumor on its bladder. After droning on and on about spending thousands of dollars on its treatment, she ends with this quote-
"It was a great relief just knowing that euthanasia was always an option for my dog. Isn't it weird that euthanasia is an option for treatment in dogs, but it's not an option for humans?"

You've got to be kidding me.